Another year has come to pass and once again I find myself penning (well, typing, actually) another message your way. This year has been filled with various ups and downs, but I seem to be on my feet as we approach Christmas, so that is nice. How are you doing up at the North Pole? I'm still waiting to hear if climate change has reached your workshop yet. I certainly hope you are staying afloat of things, both figuratively and literally.
The capitol building in Austin, TX
This year has been quite the eventful year with plenty that has left us feeling both rewarded and exhausted. Sarah and I started off the year with a short anniversary trip to Austin. Neither of us had ever been before and we thought it was important that we experience the capitol of our beloved state firsthand. Needless to say, the town lived up to its motto of "Keep Austin Weird." I kept thinking to myself that someone had spilled some San Francisco on my Texas. Either way, we had a nice weekend to ourselves away from the kids.
They truly are magical
We have discovered many things about Texas that we really enjoy and tried to fill the year with as many fun activities as we could. Our friends were kind enough to gift us with some tickets to see the Magical Winter Lights down south of us. It was the start to many fun adventures during the year.
Camping at Sea Rim State Park
I have tried my best to take my kids camping as often as I can. I feel like it gives them a chance to unplug from the electronic lifestyle they've grown accustomed to and to just enjoy being kids. Someone once said that my generation may be the last ones to go and play outside. I fear they may be right. Although if my kids tried playing outside in our current climate nine months out of the year they'd probably get heatstroke...
Huh? How did that happen?
So in February we discovered that we had an unexpected stowaway from our getaway to Austin. Sarah and I had been debating on having a fourth child, seeing as we were already exhausted with the three we had. However, it seems like the universe had different plans for us. It was an unexpected, yet welcomed surprise. When Sarah told me about it, I was just getting out of the shower. I was so surprised that for the next half hour, I forgot to put any underwear on.
This is where the magic happens
I wanted to thank you profusely for last year's present: the 3D printer. I have made an embarrassingly large proportion of things out of it and it never gives me any guff. It's nice to be able to have the capacity to bring my digital creations to life and hold them in the palm of my hand.
One of my favorite things about Houston
This year we were able to host one of my friends from my teenage years and her daughter as we explored the many things that Houston has to offer. One of the things we did was take them to the Houston Rodeo and Livestock Show, which is the one of the largest rodeos in the world. It's always fun for me to go and spend time with my family looking at all the exhibits and vendors there. I think it's important to appreciate the hard-working jobs that got us to where we are today. Being a cowboy certainly isn't something I wanted to do as a kid, but I certainly love the idea as an adult.
Bulldog bliss
I'm sort of a stingy parent when it comes to animals in the house. Although I did have hamsters and a dog growing up, I have come to realize how convenient it is to not have pets. Ergo, I have tolerated being a pet-sitter. One frequent visitor we have to the house is Philly the bulldog. To be honest, she's about as hard to sit as a potted plant, but we still love her.
Furry friends
My kids also got the experience of caring for a pair of guinea pigs and learned just how skittish they can be. Oddly enough, during the entire time, I was the only one that ever got bitten.
Not a pet
One of the things we did this year that has paid off is that we actually bought a membership to a museum. The Houston Museum of Natural Science is one of my favorite places to visit in Houston. There are so many exhibits to explore, but I have to admit that my favorite one is the gemstone exhibit. It's so fascinating to me to see how things naturally form. Change one chemical and, poof, you've got a completely different structure.
Probably the best student out of the three
One of the things we did in anticipation for the upcoming summer trip was to enroll the kids in swim school. I was very impressed with what the teachers were able to do with my kids and, although not all of them can do laps, they at least know enough to be safe around water.
Hiking the river in Capitol Reef
This summer Sarah and the kids left me in Houston to go visit family out in Utah and Idaho. There were plenty of adventures for them out there and I was able to take part with them eventually. We hiked in Capitol Reef, explored Craters of the Moon National Monument, enjoyed a day at Lagoon, had a family reunion, and enjoyed some quiet time at Fish Lake. With a pregnant mother, we probably did way more than we should have, but at this point, I hope to give them as many positive memories of childhood as I can.
They were crack shots
I've been trying to make sure my kids were exposed to the same sort of rugged activities I was as a kid, in part because I don't want them to be afraid of the world. This summer I started them off on learning about firearms and firearm safety. With all the unfortunate tragedies in this country over the past year, I wanted them to learn firsthand how to respect their second amendment rights. They were both crack shots once I got them onto a modern firearm and they had loads of fun.
This is why you break the board the first time
One of the things we've also enjoyed this year is doing taekwondo together as a family. Our city recreation center has a deal where the entire family can train for only $25 a month. We started the kids earlier in the year and once Leah had advanced into the beginners class I decided to join her. I figured I could go and watch her do lessons while I sat around or else I could join in the fun and get some exercise. I haven't regretted a moment of it and have had lots of fun getting back into martial arts. I did karate as a child, but never got up to my black belt. Now I'm on a track where I can do it together with my family.
It was good to see a smile
In spite of all the fun things we experienced this year, there has been some real trials. This past summer my dad started getting unexpected back pain which progressed into him being completely incapacitated. They eventually diagnosed him with a bacterial infection in his spine and also a misalignment of his SI joint, but they took their sweet time doing so. It was the first time in my life that I've seen my dad completely disheartened. This year he was also going to turn 80, and we wanted to have a fun family celebration for him. However, since Sarah was due to give birth around his birthday, we decided it would be better to have a smaller surprise celebration with him around Labor Day. So myself and all my brothers sneakily got to Utah and surprised him as he was sitting in his recliner. It was a tender moment to see my dad realize that he had a lot of close personal support in spite of the pain that he had been facing. He's nowhere near fully recovered right now, but we think he's finally on a track to getting back to normal. He lost a lot of strength during those months he was incapacitated, so now he's got the hard task of doing physical therapy to regrow some muscle.
Passing on the knowledge
This entire ordeal sort of drove home to me how important my family is. I have plenty of friends who don't have their parents around anymore. I feel fortunate that my parents are around still and able to do what they have been able to do. Most importantly I am grateful that they have a chance to interact with my kids. I hope they form some long-lasting memories of their grandparents.
Goofballs
Speaking of my kids, they both frustrate and thrill me to death. I constantly struggle to keep up with the messes they make and also their boundless enthusiasm for life. The oldest three thankfully are all old enough to play Minecraft together (even though Lucy has very little idea what she is doing), so they can enjoy being collectively creative. They play together more than they play with other kids, which is quite a contrast to how I grew up.
First day jitters
It's quite rewarding to see them support and love each other. I really have been blessed with good kids, even though they sometimes are too much for me to handle.
Little Leah Lou
My little Leah Lou isn't so little anymore. It has been fun to see her start to grow into being a young woman. She has a tender heart and cares for everyone in the family. I've seen her maternal instinct kick in on more than one occasion (especially as it relates to her baby brother) and I know she is on a good path. This year she started participating in the gifted and talented program at her school, which she was hoping for.
A happy day for all
This year Leah also made the decision to be baptized, which she has been looking forward to all year long. It was a very happy day for us, especially since both her grandmas were able to come to witness it. Even though we were far away from family, we were blessed to be joined on that day by countless friends that we have here in Texas.
Ground control to Major Tom...
My oldest boy certainly keeps us on our toes. One of the things he certainly doesn't lack is courage. My boy isn't afraid of being social to anyone. In fact, I think he'd be comfortable living with another family every day if you let him. He loves people, inventing things, reading, writing, and playing Minecraft. Although he often taxes my patience with his lack of focus, he surprises me with his creativity and drive. He started first grade this year and has continued his participation with the gifted and talented program at school.
I think this would be more appropriately referred to as a "sleepless study"
Can you double check for me to make sure that Sean is still on the "Nice List"? The reason I ask is because he has manifested some more behavior problems both at home and at school this year. The thing is that he doesn't fit the bill as a kid with ADHD as he can have laser focus on a task and obsession with it, almost to the extreme. Anyway, we recently had a sleep study done, as we think he just might not be getting enough quality sleep at night. We're still waiting to hear back from the doctor's office, but we hope we can get some help for him. Sean is a sweet-hearted kid with a tender soul.
Probably the most photogenic of the kids
Where to begin with Lucy? She is sweet, kind, and loving to the extreme. This girl loves to be creative, whether is be coloring, playing with clay, painting, or building with blocks. She was supposed to start Pre-K 3 this year, but due to a change in district policy, she wasn't able to. That really made her discouraged, but in the meantime she has been participating in speech therapy at the elementary school and a preschool group with friends.
Merry Christmas!
Lucy just wants to be one of the big kids and is constantly trying to show how capable she is to us and her siblings. She just wants to be involved and is learning (sometimes through struggles) that it pays to be a helper in life.
My Mal Pal
At last we come to Malcolm. He joined our little family on October 3rd of this year and has been an exhausting blessing ever since. I can't say much about his activities aside from the fact that he eats, sleeps, and poops. We are getting more and more smiles from the little guy every day and I can't begin say how much of a relief it is to have such a mellow baby as our last one. I'm excited to see how this little guy develops.
Making a person is hard work, y'all
As for Sarah, I think this picture sums up her life perfectly. For almost the past year she's been attached in one way or another to this little guy and has managed to somehow care for the other children along the way. She spends most of her time caring for others, whether is be volunteering at the elementary school or serving her friends. A lot of the time I know she is exhausted at the end of the day with the prospect of another full day ahead in the morning. She continues to amaze me at how much she cares for others and how willingly she offers up her time to help out those she cares for.
Still working at "Space Disneyland"
As for me, I'm still chugging along at life. This year at work has been relatively successful. I had the fortune on many occasions to show my management the full range of my capabilities. I feel like it has lead me on a path that could lead to better employment opportunities down the road. In the meantime, I still make fun things at NASA Johnson Space Center. A lot of things I make get international exposure, which is nice to see.
Maclunkey
In my spare time I've tried to keep my hobbies up. I recently decided to start doing a simplified version of Dungeons and Dragons for my kids to help them understand about cooperative storytelling and improvisation. So far that has been a big hit and I look forward to having many adventures for them in the future. I still love doing virtual reality and am anticipating the day when things get so immersive that I forget where I really am. There are too many fun things that I wish I could do. With the new baby, however, I have a lot less time on my hands than I used to.
Literal footage of me versus my mental health
There is one last thing I wanted to mention, Santa, that I have been reluctant to talk openly on the about in years past. I've been open to friends in private conversations and I've discussed this openly with my church congregation. But I think a lot of people I know would be surprised (or maybe not) to learn that I've struggled with depression for most of my life. I really didn't recognize/acknowledge that I had it until I was about 34 years old. Looking back I've realized that it's been with me in one form or another since I was a child. I finally sought help for the problem when I was on the verge of a mental breakdown and I realized how badly I was hurting my wife and my kids. After talking openly about it with family members, I was surprised to find that many other individuals in my family had the same issues. Turns out the problem has persisted from generation to generation and I just happened to be one of the unlucky ones who got the passed the depression/anxiety genes.
I only mention this because some of my friends that read this open letter may be thinking to themselves, "Gee this guy seems to have it all together," when in fact most days lately I'm struggling to make it through the day. Even taking an SSRI, I have to be careful about making sure I get enough sleep, otherwise I start going downhill fast. And with a new baby that needs to be taken care of in the middle of the night, a lot of old demons that I thought were gone have begin to show their faces again. It's been extremely hard and there have been days where I've gotten up from the dinner table while the kids have been misbehaving and gone straight to bed. I've been frustrated with all the weight gain I've had, especially after losing so much in years past. However, when you feel horrible every second of the day, you do whatever (no matter how irrational) to make yourself feel "good". And, you know what? Chocolate and cheese make me feel "good".
Anyway, I struggle to remind myself that my body isn't acting rationally and that my thinking is being affected by my whacked out body chemistry. It's hard to see in the moment, but I try to hold onto the times when things seem "okay". I have plenty of friends that struggle with the same problems I do and I hope they know that they don't struggle alone. I know what it's like to have every moment at church be mired in pain. I know what it's like to be to so riled up from depression that you just want to cause yourself pain to relieve the pressure. I know what it feels like to just not want to be alive (not suicidal, mind you, but just wishing life itself would end so you would be free of the pain). Others I know and care about struggle with this to a varying degree, and I would hope that they know they aren't all by themselves.
I would just hope that those who are struggling are able to take a moment in the times when things are "okay" and realize just how strong they are. I often have to remind myself how much I accomplished in spite of my struggles with mental illness: I was often in leadership positions in high school, I was an accomplished guitar player, I participated in international science fair, I served a mission for my church, I was at the top of my industrial design program at BYU, I obtained my masters degree, married a wonderful woman, and obtained a job where I regularly meet people who have been to outer space. I have to remember that I've accomplished quite a bit in spite of my mental illness, and for that I am grateful. I know for some people getting up in the morning is an accomplishment and for that I sincerely applaud you. Just know that there's one person in Texas that is rooting for your success, no matter how big or small.
In speaking of one rooting for your success, I guess that's what we are truly celebrating this Christmas season. In spite of all the darkness that I've waded through, I still try to cling to my relationship with Jesus Christ. He is the one that is rooting for our personal success in our lives. He knows the pains we experience day by day and he has the power to heal them. He has the power to wipe away the tears that come when the burden is just too much. When he asked us to cast our burdens at his feet, he was sincerely offering up his time and energies to let us know that we are worthwhile. I hope that more people feel that this Christmas season and are able to keep it with them once the excitement of the holiday season passes away.
So, Santa, I seem to have gotten a bit off topic. Usually I guess people tell you what they'd like for Christmas. I've really been thinking about it for a while and I've realized that I just wish I had more time to enjoy the things I already have. If you have any of that in your sack this year, I'd love to have a piece. Time is the one thing I seem to have a deficit on. Just know that I appreciate all the goodwill that you have been spreading over the centuries. I'm sure if people thought more like you did, it would truly feel like Christmas every day.
Sincerely,
-Brad Reynolds
P.S. We're watching Philly for Christmas this year, so please watch out for her slobber when you come down the chimney.
P.P.S. I'd also love a trip to Disneyworld for my family, but it can wait until next year.
P.P.P.S. Still waiting on that Jaeger Fighting Robot if you have room in your sleigh this year.
